Merry Christmas everyone!!  

 And a Happy New Year  

<sub>Feel free to ignore this, just me venting and trying to cope with depression... again. 

I can make artwork in a day. It's rare but possible. 
I have a few finished pieces to post actually. 
I put off posting them since I have so much in my inbox to get to. 
I have severe social anxiety. Worse over the last couple years. 
I keep feeling like people are noticing and / or judging my activity. 
I keep feeling like I shouldn't post until I'm caught up on other people's posts. 
I keep feeling bad for putting off commenting for weeks or months. 
I keep feeling like I have no energy or resilience anymore. 
I keep feeling like my art is meaningless or bland. 
I keep feeling I have more potential than this... 
I keep feeling I could make something bigger, epic... 
I keep feeling like giving up on my stories. Or restarting... 
I keep wanting a break; from everything. Life. People. Chores. Internet. MY BRAIN

It's like I have this horrible, nasty, bitch living in my head, constantly telling me I'm useless, unwanted, meaningless, unaccomplished, weird etc. etc. I should give "her" a name... Maybe Mya? LOL I dunno. My name anagram they say if you name something it becomes easier to remove it from yourself?? Something like that, anyways. 

These feelings are just that; feelings. They don't manifest from anyone or anything but myself and my endless negative thoughts that consume me every. Damn. Day. 

And on top of all this brain chatter, I feel so pulled in SO many directions... being told what to do with my life and how to live it, being chained to responsibilities and priorities, without, seemingly, no way to escape and just live how I WANT to live. I don't even know HOW I want to live most the time... just vague ideals. 

I'm taking great interest in life improving methods via YouTube lately though, and found so many amazing people that are LIVING their great lives everyday I'm not jealous at all, I'm simply in AWE of them and want so bad to get myself to that point; where I'm just full of energy and fulfilled and inspired and laughing everyday!! It would be bliss~

Along those lines, I have been, unintentionally, writing a lot of deep stuff, like, I could write a BOOK with the amount of notes I've made on life, the world, society etc. XD Just writing down insights... our advanced brains are a blessing and a curse. Fact

"You make your own happy, you make your own stress" - Me</sub>

Found this aaaaaages ago XD they are fun so I really should do them more lol. Maybe?

We have Elicia today



Rules:

1. Pick one of your OCs
2. Fill in the question/statements as if you were that OC
3. Tag four people to do this meme


1. What is your name?
Elicia v3v

2. Do you know why are you named that?
How should I know? >.< My parents just liked the name... I was Alicia but Pinkaila changed it in case anyone confused me with Amilia >___> as if I have anything in common with that strange girl!! -o-

3. Are you single or taken?
*blushes like hell* That's none of your business... But yes. Next question >.>

4. Have any abilities or powers?
Well, I have the ability to know what clothes suit people, unlike SOME individuals vuv and the power to ignore imbeciles opinions~

5. Stop being a Mary Sue.
Being perfect? Well, I believe I am to some degree :3

6. What's your eye color?
Reddish brown

7. What's your hair color?
Dark brown... are you blind?? -o- or does Pinkaila need to draw me more?

8. Have any family members?
*sighs* Yes, unfortunately... My mother passed away when I was young, but my father is a selfish a-hole (her opinion) and my siblings expected me to do EVERYTHING for them... I live with my Uncle now. He treats me fairly. 

9. How about pets?
My uncle has 2 dogs! I adore them so much ^u^ I walk them everyday. 

10. That's cool, I guess. Now tell me something you don't like.
This interview. I have things to DO you know!! e.e

11. Do have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?
Hmm? Well, I have a vast collection of clothing and makeup items vuv I hope to be a fashion designer someday and currently have a blog with tips and advice. It's doing quite well and studying business will help~ Otherwise, college takes up a lot of time and helping out my Uncle and caring for the dogs... I'd happily do nothing all day if I could >.<

12. Have you ever hurt anyone in anyway?
Yes... Family members... next question. 

13. Ever... killed anyone?
Hmph, wanted to. 

14. What kind of animal are you?
Um?? Maybe a maine coon cat? I don't know XP

15. Name your worst habits.
Biting people's heads off, apparently... and staring at people without realising... 

16. Do you look up to anyone at all?
Lots of online models and fashion creators yes VuV I'll be one of them one day~ And my girlfriend, I don't deserve her kindness some days ;n;

17. Are you gay, straight or bisexual?
I am dating a female, yes. 

18. Do you go to school?
College yes, I'm studying business, fashion design and accountancy as my uncle suggested finances would help greatly within business and such... it's boring but it'll be useful in life!!

19. Ever want to get married and have kids one day?
Goodness no!! >.< I've had enough caring for my siblings when they were younger!! Children are horrid!! I should know, I WAS one... 

20. Do you have any fangirls/fanboys?
*blushes* O//////O how on Earth should I know? I believe LizLoveLie has complimented me a few times, as well as others~ Yet again, Pinkaila, you need to draw me V.V
ME: OMG OK I GET IT LOL)

21. What are you most afraid of?
Losing my uncle... he's been my rock for years now. I love him more than any of my other family... 

22. What clothes do you usually wear?
Haha! Anything I pick out looks amazing!! But I tend to wear darker colours and things that show off my curves~

23. What's one food that tempts you?
Fruit!! I could eat fruit all day... especially berries... Great, I'm hungry now XP

24. What class are you (low/middle/high)?
... Probably middle >_____> but I act like I'm in high. Because people definitely treat you different... I know from experience. 

25. What are your thoughts on pie?
 

26. Favorite drink?
Yet again anything fruity! Can't go wrong with cranberry juice, very healthy too~

27. What's your favorite place?
My bedroom. Where I can just zone out and ignore the entire world and get my creativity going <33

28. Are you interested in anyone?
*blinks* Love interest? I already said I'm dating someone >_>

29. That was a stupid question.
Yes. It was. Stop wasting my time -o-

30. Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean?
Neither?? Both are filthy and ridden with reptiles and fish!! Disgusting. Bath please. 

31. What's your type?
Of?... OF WHAT?!? >:U

32. Camping or outdoors?
... They're the same?!? I can't stand mud and insects and grass and NATURE. It's... unnatural!!
ME: Yes she just said that

33. Any fetishes?
O/////O None of your damn business!! I'm leaving now. I have business studies to attend to -3-

I tag 
Anyone who wants to do it!

LOL you all probably think Elicia's a total selfish bitch........ and you'd be 80% right *shotshot*

Thanks for reading~~

Have you ever got to a point in your life where you think "What the actual hell am I doing with my life?????" then your heart sinks to the centre of Earth and your mind goes shooting off in a bazillion directions and questions every damn detail of your entire existence and history and current situation and the meaning of it all and what really matters in the end and you suddenly panic that you've already wasted SO. MUCH. TIME. On meaningless, trivial, irrelevant, mundane rubbish and then...  *INHALES* you just give up and go eat snacks and watch TV....

OK. I've jumped on a bandwagon. I need to admit something right now; I'm getting Sonic obsessed again* lol. 

Sorry not sorry  (but it inspires me to draw original stuff which is always good XD)

With the movie hype this year, I've been watching some of the TV shows again, watching games cutscenes etc. 

Chances are you've seen the trailer... 


It's a typical Hollywood story and format, Jim Carrey will be hilarious. But Sonic's design .................. has KILLED the internet LOL. 
THE DIRECTOR, this morning, has claimed to FIX IT.... the DIRECTOR. That's huge right?? All because of social media... wow. Just wow. 

Now, quick rant here, that's GREAT they've claimed to fix it all in 6 months (my birthday month!! It's destiny!!) but alas, it has all been motion captured. I totally feel for the CGI team right now, the pressure is INSANE on those guys ;;n;; to translate the motion capture human model into an anthropomorphic, fused-eyed, toon-proportioned character will NOT be simple... but hey, social media blew up, so it has to be done somehow OTL or they totally scrap the mo-cap and make him a cartoon again. Yep. 

*Was obsessed when I was 10 - 14 ish omg cringe. 

Anyways, for those watching me since forever, I'm sorry it has come to this; me making a freakin journal about a Sonic movie X'D

#sonic #sonicmovie #sonicthehedgehog #sonicmovie2019 #gottafixfast #sorrynotsorry